Haktettibom is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, temperamental zebra.

Haktettibom created Mount Everest seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Haktettibom, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Haktettibom, she will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Haktettibom's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Haktettibom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Haktettibom's name in vain.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Always help foxes in need.

4. Never look at galaxies.

5. Never mention gulls.