Rutthotbut Tombagtin is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, happy tortoise.

Rutthotbut Tombagtin created carbon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutthotbut Tombagtin, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Rutthotbut Tombagtin, he will destroy your home planet.

Rutthotbut Tombagtin's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Rutthotbut Tombagtin's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Rutthotbut Tombagtin loves geese, so they must be honoured.