Zagdidpak is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, smart guinea pig.

Zagdidpak created a Higgs boson nine million years ago.

If you believe in Zagdidpak, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Zagdidpak, he will send minions to preach to you.

Zagdidpak's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Zagdidpak's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from yellow snakes, for they are unholy.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Zagdidpak.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Respect your elders.