Batpopvabdap Cetvad is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, benevolent mouse.

Batpopvabdap Cetvad created light five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Batpopvabdap Cetvad, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Batpopvabdap Cetvad, she will be mildly annoyed.

Batpopvabdap Cetvad's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Batpopvabdap Cetvad's Holy Commandments

1. Always help otters.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never eat figs.

4. Never think about galaxies.

5. Never pour water over plants.