Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, annoying turtle.

Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat created the planet Jupiter four years ago.

If you believe in Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat, she will send you a sign.

Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms brown.

2. Never write about galaxies.

3. Feed all hungry rats.

4. Put Yattfenhabsabbus Padtargcat first in all things.

5. Do not wear gold on your body.