Legmetbadmidtamzanponton is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, all-knowing chicken.

Legmetbadmidtamzanponton created the solar system six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Legmetbadmidtamzanponton, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Legmetbadmidtamzanponton, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Legmetbadmidtamzanponton's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Legmetbadmidtamzanponton's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured tortoises.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Legmetbadmidtamzanponton.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Never write about black holes.