Sabbopbum is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, witty whale.

Sabbopbum created everything that exists nine million years ago.

If you believe in Sabbopbum, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Sabbopbum, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Sabbopbum's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Sabbopbum's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

3. Never feed figs to frogs while wearing turquoise shoes.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Respect your elders.