Bastcinzig is a god.

He takes the form of a small, moody dragonfly.

Bastcinzig created viruses seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bastcinzig, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bastcinzig, he will strike you with lightening.

Bastcinzig's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Bastcinzig's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your arms cyan.

2. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a building before entering it.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Hide from purple voles for they are unholy.

5. Never think about amino acids.