Ominsigjabfon is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, egotistical donkey.

Ominsigjabfon created the planet Mars three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ominsigjabfon, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ominsigjabfon, she will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Ominsigjabfon's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Ominsigjabfon's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always make sure there are no mites in a building before entering it.

3. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

4. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling space.

5. Never eat green fruit.