Nattinvad Rowxucfit is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, contented goat.

Nattinvad Rowxucfit created the planet Saturn nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nattinvad Rowxucfit, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nattinvad Rowxucfit, she will turn you into a tree.

Nattinvad Rowxucfit's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Nattinvad Rowxucfit's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Erect eight nickel sculptures of Nattinvad Rowxucfit on top of important buildings.

3. Never write about bacteria.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Hide from magenta tapirs for they are unholy.