Carkamhatsinquat is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, passionate mouse.

Carkamhatsinquat created Mount Everest five billion years ago.

If you believe in Carkamhatsinquat, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Carkamhatsinquat, he will try to impress you with trees.

Carkamhatsinquat's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Carkamhatsinquat's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap near ducks.

2. Never chant in the presence of goats.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Always treat gulls with great respect.

5. Never eat green fruit.