Cunkemcab Listmaprut is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, intelligent narwhal.

Cunkemcab Listmaprut created the Virgo Supercluster three million years ago.

If you believe in Cunkemcab Listmaprut, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cunkemcab Listmaprut, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Cunkemcab Listmaprut's most sacred site is Troms in Norway.

Cunkemcab Listmaprut's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Never write about quantum gravity.

3. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

4. Never chant in holy places.

5. Respect your elders.