Lagcutdunfligliportjarn is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, intelligent narwhal.

Lagcutdunfligliportjarn created the Whirlpool Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Lagcutdunfligliportjarn, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Lagcutdunfligliportjarn, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Lagcutdunfligliportjarn's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Lagcutdunfligliportjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Put Lagcutdunfligliportjarn first in all things.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Bats are not to be trusted.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never feed wheat to frogs while wearing fawn hats.