Sigominkom is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, resourceful spider.

Sigominkom created dark energy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sigominkom, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Sigominkom, he will send you a sign.

Sigominkom's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Sigominkom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Never feed nuts to bats while wearing indigo skirts.

4. Do not skip in public.

5. Never eat rice.