Batgadran is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, astonishing alligator.

Batgadran created snails four million years ago.

If you believe in Batgadran, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Batgadran, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Batgadran's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Batgadran's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never jump near ants.

4. Always help horses in need.

5. Porpoises are not to be trusted.