Dabnurlgamzedkadvan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, self-confident faun.

Dabnurlgamzedkadvan created the Cigar Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dabnurlgamzedkadvan, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Dabnurlgamzedkadvan, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Dabnurlgamzedkadvan's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Dabnurlgamzedkadvan's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Erect five lead sculptures of Dabnurlgamzedkadvan on top of important buildings.

3. Never laugh in holy places.

4. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always obey Dabnurlgamzedkadvan's priests.