Tennulkim Rulfodbiggatfub is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, dishonourable mink.

Tennulkim Rulfodbiggatfub created an up quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Tennulkim Rulfodbiggatfub, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tennulkim Rulfodbiggatfub, she will boil you in a big pot.

Tennulkim Rulfodbiggatfub's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Tennulkim Rulfodbiggatfub's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear blue.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate dolphins.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Feed all hungry badgers.