Bassyikpad is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, grumpy ant.

Bassyikpad created viruses two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bassyikpad, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bassyikpad, she will be very unhappy.

Bassyikpad's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Bassyikpad's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near doves.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always stare at clouds.