Vadlunnab is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, staggering warg.

Vadlunnab created Mount Everest five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vadlunnab, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Vadlunnab, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Vadlunnab's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Vadlunnab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

2. Always treat porpoises with great respect.

3. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

4. Always wear gray.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.