Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, weak armadillo.

Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap created viruses four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap, he will not care at all.

Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no manatees in a room before entering it.

2. Do not take Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap's name in vain.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Worship no other gods but Lanladnul Kadgovnulltailmetcim Podpombap.