Afwiklab is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, cheerful duck.

Afwiklab created life seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Afwiklab, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Afwiklab, he will turn you into a dog.

Afwiklab's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Afwiklab's Holy Commandments

1. Always help pigs.

2. Do not speak about turnips.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate ducks.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.