Rakfutyarl is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, slow jaguar.

Rakfutyarl created the Sombrero Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rakfutyarl, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Rakfutyarl, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Rakfutyarl's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Rakfutyarl's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven snails approach from the west.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

5. Run away from mauve capybaras, for they are unholy.