Cunfaslan Fetfetlit is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, flying gnu.

Cunfaslan Fetfetlit created carbon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cunfaslan Fetfetlit, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cunfaslan Fetfetlit, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Cunfaslan Fetfetlit's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Cunfaslan Fetfetlit's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Do not eat garlic.