Wigartvag is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, selfish chinchilla.

Wigartvag created oxygen six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigartvag, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Wigartvag, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Wigartvag's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Wigartvag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear lead on your body.

2. Always help aardvarks.

3. Do not take Wigartvag's name in vain.

4. Never go into fawn rooms.

5. Never eat green fruit.