Cipfotfun is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unjust squid.

Cipfotfun created the universe three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cipfotfun, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Cipfotfun, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cipfotfun's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Cipfotfun's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention aardvarks.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not wear silver on your body.

5. Doves are not to be trusted.