Wapnadcap is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unjust lizard.

Wapnadcap created an up quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapnadcap, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Wapnadcap, it will try to impress you with trees.

Wapnadcap's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Wapnadcap's Holy Commandments

1. Always help doves.

2. Never look at galaxies.

3. Erect a large gold sculpture of Wapnadcap on top of all buildings.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Never think about comets.