Fligmifmig is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, compassionate bear.

Fligmifmig created a charm quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fligmifmig, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fligmifmig, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Fligmifmig's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Fligmifmig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help swans in need.

2. Worship no other gods but Fligmifmig.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Never wear brown kilts.

5. Always help porpoises.