Cibpidarf Wikmotstik is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, merciful dryad.

Cibpidarf Wikmotstik created the planet Jupiter three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cibpidarf Wikmotstik, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cibpidarf Wikmotstik, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Cibpidarf Wikmotstik's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Cibpidarf Wikmotstik's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Cibpidarf Wikmotstik.

3. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not hurt shrews.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.