Bumkenfudflamgem is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, temperamental gerbil.

Bumkenfudflamgem created energy two years ago.

If you believe in Bumkenfudflamgem, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bumkenfudflamgem, it will turn you into a puffin.

Bumkenfudflamgem's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Bumkenfudflamgem's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

2. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Bumkenfudflamgem.