Dutvaddim is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, effective bird.

Dutvaddim created the Whirlpool Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Dutvaddim, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dutvaddim, it will turn you into a mouse.

Dutvaddim's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Dutvaddim's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate ducks.

2. Run away from cyan whales, for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Never think about gravity.