Gebquagkop Rigwikbet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, intelligent deer.

Gebquagkop Rigwikbet created water nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebquagkop Rigwikbet, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Gebquagkop Rigwikbet, she will remove you from existence.

Gebquagkop Rigwikbet's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Gebquagkop Rigwikbet's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never go into yellow rooms.

3. Never write about amino acids.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

5. Never wear skirts.