Canmobyik is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, selfish skunk.

Canmobyik created a charm quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Canmobyik, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Canmobyik, it will turn you into a frog.

Canmobyik's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Canmobyik's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear turquoise.

2. Do not hurt mites.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Erect four gold sculptures of Canmobyik on top of important buildings.

5. Hide if six sharks approach from the east.