Saftipkaddittikjap is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, prudent deer.

Saftipkaddittikjap created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Saftipkaddittikjap, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Saftipkaddittikjap, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Saftipkaddittikjap's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Saftipkaddittikjap's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Always treat otters with great respect.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Saftipkaddittikjap must be the most important thing in your life.