Dapgessmidsab is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, clever duck.

Dapgessmidsab created the solar system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapgessmidsab, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dapgessmidsab, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Dapgessmidsab's most sacred site is Thimmanaickenpalayam in India.

Dapgessmidsab's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

2. Never look at black holes.

3. Never hurt shrews.

4. Worship no other gods but Dapgessmidsab.

5. Always make sure there are no gulls in a room before entering it.