Parkfiggam is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, caring dragonfly.

Parkfiggam created Africa seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Parkfiggam, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Parkfiggam, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Parkfiggam's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Parkfiggam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never talk about geese.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Never feed turnips to whales while wearing mauve corsets.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Parkfiggam.