Zedcarflag is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, resourceful crab.

Zedcarflag created the Cigar Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Zedcarflag, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Zedcarflag, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Zedcarflag's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Zedcarflag's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not dye your hair cyan.

4. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Zedcarflag on top of all buildings.

5. Always help dolphins in need.