Dudshavxem Flamgungepfit is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, dishonourable mouse.

Dudshavxem Flamgungepfit created the planet Saturn eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Dudshavxem Flamgungepfit, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Dudshavxem Flamgungepfit, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Dudshavxem Flamgungepfit's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Dudshavxem Flamgungepfit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Always help cats in need.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Never look in ponds.