Stanpitnil is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, self-assured frog.

Stanpitnil created a bottom quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Stanpitnil, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Stanpitnil, she will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Stanpitnil's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Stanpitnil's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into black rooms.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Always take life seriously.