Dabflatstik is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, impressive yak.

Dabflatstik created the universe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dabflatstik, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dabflatstik, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dabflatstik's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Dabflatstik's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight silicon sculptures of Dabflatstik on top of important buildings.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always make sure there are no ants in a building before entering it.

4. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Dabflatstik on top of all buildings.

5. Always obey Dabflatstik's priests.