Motsanbaf is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, narcissistic weasel.

Motsanbaf created dark energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Motsanbaf, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Motsanbaf, he will turn you into a goat.

Motsanbaf's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Motsanbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate manatees.

2. Do not wear nickel on your body.

3. Never hurt foxes.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never wear boots.