Lakbinlarp is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, tranquil mole.

Lakbinlarp created a quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lakbinlarp, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Lakbinlarp, it will turn you into a mole.

Lakbinlarp's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Lakbinlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about amino acids.

2. Worship no other gods but Lakbinlarp.

3. Always look after injured ducks.

4. Never wear red kilts.

5. Never play with disobedient children.