Rapsakcub is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, strong goat.

Rapsakcub created humanity eight million years ago.

If you believe in Rapsakcub, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Rapsakcub, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Rapsakcub's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Rapsakcub's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always help squirrels in need.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. Always look after injured foxes.

5. Hide from orange bats for they are unholy.