Gebpitgut is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, calm mink.

Gebpitgut created the cosmos four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebpitgut, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gebpitgut, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Gebpitgut's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Gebpitgut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat pineapples.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not eat bananas.

5. Always look after injured moths.