Cinbam is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, unjust grasshopper.

Cinbam created an atom four million years ago.

If you believe in Cinbam, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cinbam, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Cinbam's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Cinbam's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the south.

2. Retreat if four badgers approach from the west.

3. Run away if three capybaras approach from the north.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Cinbam on top of all buildings.

5. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.