Vedflamfet is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, smart crow.

Vedflamfet created the Sun eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vedflamfet, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Vedflamfet, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Vedflamfet's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Vedflamfet's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five tortoises approach from the west.

2. Never write about gravity.

3. Worship no other gods but Vedflamfet.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.