Catmotmad is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, unsympathetic toad.

Catmotmad created snails seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Catmotmad, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Catmotmad, she will not invite you to parties.

Catmotmad's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Catmotmad's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the west.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Always help sick frogs.