Lopdontarg is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, confident fly.

Lopdontarg created energy four years ago.

If you believe in Lopdontarg, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lopdontarg, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Lopdontarg's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Lopdontarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not eat turnips.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

5. Never talk about amino acids.