Kimsab is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, passionate ferret.

Kimsab created a photon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kimsab, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kimsab, he will torture you forever.

Kimsab's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Kimsab's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear blue stockings.

2. Always obey Kimsab's priests.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Feed all hungry swans.

5. Never wear rings.