Flapbonkkar is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, temperamental hare.

Flapbonkkar created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flapbonkkar, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flapbonkkar, he will turn you into a rock.

Flapbonkkar's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Flapbonkkar's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Flapbonkkar.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Always help sharks in need.

4. Never talk about asteroids.

5. Fast once a month.