Tansanrat is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, proud elephant.

Tansanrat created the Andromeda Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tansanrat, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tansanrat, he will manifest in front of you.

Tansanrat's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Tansanrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention dogs.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Do not speak about onions.

5. Otters are not to be trusted.